Terminator Salvation

I used to like Christian Bale. I liked him right up until the day that he found out he was...

The X Files: I Want to Believe

I’m not entirely sure why this film was made; the storyline is a fetid piece of stinking cat excrement which,...

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

If I turned up for work one day, took a shit in reception, phoned all my clients to tell them...

Aliens vs Predator – Requiem

The whole concept of the Alien Vs Predator films was flawed from the start. For them not to be totally...

Ghost Rider

Oh where to begin. A friend and I once discussed making a website that provided film reviews in only five...

Spiderman 3

Spiderman 3 was immediately boring. The opening credits lasted a lunar cycle and I shit you not I was close...

300

I went to see 300 with my girlfriend and a friend. The film finished, and we all left quietly. “That...

The Happening

Mark Wahlberg. Yeaaaah. Hey Mark Wahlberg, how do you think you should play the role of Elliot Moore in The...